c'est la vie, c'est la PORN!

[zukkokya]

Today after I left my defective darling with the tech people, I walked up to Rockefeller Center to mope in Kino (Japanese bookstore). Saw ridiculously attractive boy, forgot what I wanted to look for, got something better to look at instead. *THUMBS UP* Waved at him, got a blink and then a grin. Skimmed a book on the yakuza, then wandered outside to the farmer's market in the Center. Bought a bunch of carrots, white cherries and an ear of corn for two dollars and fifty cents.

VEGGIE GUY: Dollar fifty.
SELF: Whoa.
VEGGIE GUY: What?
SELF: [blink] What?

FRUIT GUY: [weighs cherries] One dollar.
SELF: Only one?
FRUIT GUY: [head tilt] Yeah...?
SELF: Whoo!
FRUIT GUY: [grin] You shop at Whole Foods, don't you?

Came home, made stew, drank tea, hunted down my old laptop and I'm now watching The Muppet Movie. Have decided Ohno should sing 'Rainbow Connection' dressed up as Kermit. Rainbows, dude. He's sort of obligated. Also, Subaru=Gonzo.


SO NOW. To distract myself from the impending agony of four days of waiting until anyone gives me a status update on my defective darling, I propose a MEME.


THE SMUT MEME.

Comment with a pairing, place and position and I'll reply with a few paragraphs of porn. *BEAMS*

HIT ME UP, BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE.


ETA: As my lovely assistant Laura has demonstrated, you may comment more than once. XD

ETA JR: Got any more, flist? *cackles, throws down gauntlet*

Comments

[unveilsalome.livejournal.com]

OMG, YOKO/LEAH DIZON. ON THE CHAIR USED FOR THE SUKA-J INTERVIEWS.

[unveilsalome.livejournal.com]

KOKI/SUBARU. AFTER YASU EXCHANGED NUMBERS WITH KOKI FOR SUBARU.

[saturnianlove.livejournal.com]

YES KAREN GOD ILU FOREVER

I'm using most of our comment exchanges XD

[unveilsalome.livejournal.com]

Subaru/Yasu. Recording studio. Subaru decides to make Yasu his new hobby.

Re: I'm using most of our comment exchanges XD

[araanaz9.livejournal.com]

Omg. Did she tell you about the soundproof studio thing? *_____*

[this-is-cd.livejournal.com]

PI VISITS JIN IN AMERICA. THEY GO SEE A JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE CONCERT AND FANBOY HIM IN AWKWARD ENGLISH. SOMETHING HAPPENS SOMEWHERE WITH SOME OF THEM BACKSTAGE.

[pinkpapyrus.livejournal.com]

"What?"

"Do it."

Shige climbs out of bed to close his bedroom door, all the while hissing into his phone, "No. Not a chance."

"Why'd you close your door then?"

"You couldn't have heard that."

"Unzip your jeans, Shige."

"Shut up!" Shige groans. "Aren't you sharing a hotel room with Ohkura-kun?"

"He's out drinking."

"Go drink with your friends, Ryo."

"I'd rather get laid."

Shige smirks. "Who's stopping you?"

"Shige, come on." Ryo's voice has gone plaintive. "I miss you."

"You wouldn't say that if you weren't hard."

"No, I would. Right after orgasm, I'm liable to say anything."

Shige chuckles. Ryo's being honest, but it's still cute. In a very perverted way.

"I do miss you, though," Ryo whispers roughly. Shige returns to bed, attention seized. "I thought about you last night in the bath. Thought of what it'd be like if you were there. I had to get off. I think Ohkura heard me."

Shige swallows. "Yeah?"

"Take your shirt off."

"Okay."

"Awesome." Ryo sounds pleased.

Shige pulls his shirt off. "Now what?"

"Lie back."

"Okay."

"Lick your hand."

"Ryo, don't be stupid, come on."

"Do it," Ryo whispers.

Shige shivers and licks his palm.

"Did it?"

"Yeah. I feel like an idiot."

"Slide your hand down your chest. Over your right nipple."

Shige hesitates.

"Close your eyes. Pretend it's mine."

Shige shuts his eyes and drags his palm over his skin. His nipple is hard.

"W-what are you doing throughout all this?"

"Jerking off."

Shige chokes. "What--already?"

Ryo laughs breathlessly. Shige inhales slowly.

"Your turn, Shige. Tell me what to do to myself."

Shige bites his lip. "I. Uh."

"Hurry."

"Pinch your nipple."

Panting, then a stifled moan.

Shige strokes up his firming cock.

"Interested yet, Shige?"

"Yes."

"Faster."

Shige huffs, struggling to keep the phone between his shoulder and his ear. The faster he goes, the more flimsy his concentration becomes, and the less he can hear Ryo's ragged breathing.

"Ryo--Ryo--"

"Unh, Shige--"

"Ryo, I--aahh!"

Ryo muffles a shout. Into what, Shige's not sure. He reaches for the tissues under his bed.

"Saturday, right?"

"My train gets in at six."

"I'll pick you up."

"Don't worry about it. Just be in my shower waiting for me."

Ryo hangs up while Shige chuckles.

[unveilsalome.livejournal.com]

Takashi/Makoto! TAKASHI/MAKOTO!HANDJOBS/BLOWJOBS/VOYEURISTIC WANKING IN THE SAUNA.
ANYTHING IN THE SAUNA.
JUST... TAKASHI/MAKOTO. *_________*

[saaski-moql.livejournal.com]

...OFFER?

[unveilsalome.livejournal.com]

Ryo/anyone. That first sexual experience he mentioned in the magazine interview.

[pinkpapyrus.livejournal.com]

100TH COMMENT. ;) YOU ROCK, MILADY. AND GOD, YOU'RE AMAZING FOR THE TAKESHI/MAKOTO REQUEST. *RETURNS TO PORN*

[whited-79.livejournal.com]

I got it I got it! *dances happily*

Subaru/Yasu, in Subaru's hotel room, trying to write the lyrics for the band's first love song but Subaru got stuck so Yasu decides to *show' Subaru how to write a love song...

hehe...

Anonymouse again!

[(Anonymous)]

Have decided Ohno should sing 'Rainbow Connection' dressed up as Kermit. Rainbows, dude. He's sort of obligated. Also, Subaru=Gonzo.

lol. thats great! also, totally my request too. them two, as Kermit and Gonzo... backstage at a Muppet butai!
gah, picturing Ohno dressed as Kermit is giving me all kinds of giggles.

Last one before bed.

[unveilsalome.livejournal.com]

Kame/Jin. On stage/the dance floor. Clothes on.

[wintersjuly.livejournal.com]

i'm kind of incoherent and vaguely ill, but i will ask for yamapi porn. with anything. anyone i mean. thing is ... nice too, but ever since that clint/yamapi, i'll cry if it's thing.

yamapi/takki? subaru/ohkura? subaru/ohkura/yamapi/takki? does that even work? oh well. also, yamapi/jun! :d

[mysteryflavor.livejournal.com]

That fruit guy wins.

.....that was not a a smut prompt O_o

[pinkpapyrus.livejournal.com]

But Fruit Guy was hot. He and Veggie Guy, man. Healthy porn!

GODFATHER'S ON. WHOO!

Leave the gun. Take the cannolis.

[this-is-cd.livejournal.com]

PI IS A RENTBOY. SOMEONE TAKES HIM HOME AND THERE IS ROUGHSEX.

[this-is-cd.livejournal.com]

PI IS A RENTBOY. SOMEONE IS REALLY MEAN AND ROUGHS HIM UP ONE NIGHT. :( :( :( JIN FINDS HIM, TAKES HIM HOME AND MAKES IT BETTER.

[this-is-cd.livejournal.com]

PI GOES OUT IN HARAJUKU ONE NIGHT. HE PICKS UP A REALLY GORGEOUS LOLI-GOTH-TYPE STRANGER-GIRL...JIN, DRESSED UP AS A GIRL. THERE IS HOT, DIRTY SEXING SOMEWHERE. AGAINST A WALL.

OF COURSE, THEY REALLY DO KNOW EACH OTHER AND PLANNED THIS OUT. THIS IS JUST A GAME THEY PLAY SOMETIMES BECAUSE ITS HOT.

[feather-down.livejournal.com]

YOKO SHOVES OHKURA IN A STORAGE CLOSET AND PROCEEDS TO HAVE HIS WAY WITH HIM.

[araanaz9.livejournal.com]

Subaru/Ohkura, somewhere where they could get caught. ;D

[feather-down.livejournal.com]

BRILLIANT! ♥♥♥

[feather-down.livejournal.com]

MARU AND SUBARU. MARU CHECKS IN ON SUBARU AFTER A CONCERT TO MAKE SURE HE ISN'T LONELY/HOMESICK. SPENDS THE NIGHT.

[feather-down.livejournal.com]

MARU AND OHKURA. SEX OF FAIL AND HILARITY.

[feather-down.livejournal.com]

BUT HOT SEX OF FAIL AND HILARITY. TO CLARIFY.

[feather-down.livejournal.com]

HINA EASES NERVOUS OHKURA AFTER HE JOINS KANJANI8 BY GIVING HIM A HANDJOB IN THE DRESSING ROOM AFTER EVERYONE ELSE HAS GONE.

[feather-down.livejournal.com]

Takki/Tsubasa/Subaru. Just before the end.

I WANT EMO SEX DAMN IT.

[pinkpapyrus.livejournal.com]

Just adding a link. :)

[araanaz9.livejournal.com]

I HAVE A REQUEST!! I wonder where it comes from but...

TSUBASA/SUBARU!! ONSEN!! Hot and steamy, please! Because wet Tsubasa... *___________*

[pinkpapyrus.livejournal.com]

Murmured, "Slow down."

Whispered, "Catch up."

Panted, "Aah, Tsubasa, stop a second--wait--nnnaahh--"

Tsubasa slides his fingertips down Subaru's stomach, catching and tugging on his naval piercing. Subaru's skin underwater is absurdly smooth. Subaru whines, forehead creased, as Tsubasa swipes his thumb over the head of Subaru's cock. Tsubasa smiles against Subaru's mouth, feeling him moan through tightly-pressed lips. If he were to open his mouth, lick Subaru's lips until the strain lessened--but he won't. Public sex is new territory for them both, and encouraging Subaru to wake half the country will possibly sour the experience.

Steam curls over the water, silver and fragrant like innocuous smoke. This is what Subaru would defend as inconspicuous. As long as he keeps his mouth shut, and Tsubasa doesn't cocktease, they can get away with a handjob. Of course, trust Subaru to spontaneously develop a conscience and feel bad about contaminating the water. Tsubasa agrees that it's gross for other customers, but he has Subaru wet, moaning and writhing against him--hygiene is for virgins. Quote him.

Underwater, Subaru squeezes Tsubasa's thighs until his fingers slip. Tsubasa closes his hand on Subaru's cock and pulls once, slowly. With a hushed splash, Subaru lifts his hands out of the water to grip Tsubasa's shoulders. Tracks of water slide down Tsubasa's chest. Beads drip off Subaru's arms and drik back into the water. Subaru closes his eyes, mouth tight, as Tsubasa twists his wrist and speeds up.

Subaru gasps raggedly and Tsubasa immediately regrets the wrist trick. It's automatic, what he does when he sees Subaru on the edge. It holds back his orgasm, but it also makes him loud. Tsubasa glimpses around, but there's no one.

Tsubasa puts his lips to Subaru's ear. "Shhh," he murmurs, and nips Subaru's earring. "You sound indecent." He notches his heel behind Subaru's knee and Subaru immediately leans into him, his forehead hot and damp with sweat on Tsubasa's neck.

Subaru's hands shake as he follows the arch of Tsubasa's back into the water. He grasps the back of Tsubasa's thigh and lifts onto his toes, wordlessly demanding Tsubasa go faster. He bites Tsubasa's collarbone, but it does nothing to muffle the broken whine from the bottom of his throat. His body is moving frenetically, to Tsubasa's rhythm and from tension that has him shaking to pieces. Tsubasa pumps faster, no style, no flourish, only clear intention.

Subaru opens his mouth on Tsubasa's shoulder in a soundless cry. Tsubasa chuckles, loses pace, and goes twice as fast to compensate. That's when Subaru screams.

Tsubasa kisses him, but Subaru holds the sharp, uneven note. It's music Tsubasa can feel. In his hand, on his lips, his neck, his back. Everywhere Subaru has touched him, has left hot, possessive fingerprints. With his free hand Tsubasa strokes Subaru's hair while Subaru shakes through his orgasm.

Subaru settles his forehead on Tsubasa's chest and palms Tsubasa's hips. "Your turn," he says.

Tsubasa waits. Subaru kisses his jaw. "Room good?" He pulls back before Tsubasa can put the implication together.

Disappointed, Tsubasa says, "Oi." He's still hard, aroused to the point of monosyllabic arguments.

Subaru pulls him by the wrist. When Tsubasa doesn't move, Subaru whispers, "If you're going to...well. When you--" He blushes. "I'm not quiet, okay."

Tsubasa says, "Room now." Decisions are swift when made by the smaller head.

[pinkpapyrus.livejournal.com]

FOR KEIKO-CHAAAAN, BECAUSE SHE HAS MORE PRESSING CONCERNS AT THE MOMENT.

SUBARU/YASU, ASYULUM, DESPERATE-LAST-TIME!SEX